My dear Unniettan
17 November 2017

When i started writing I wanted to make the title my dear Unnikuttan but then I thought otherwise and so it remains my dear Unniettan.

The first that I heard of Unniettan was when my aunt and uncle called to let us know that my dearest cousin sister, Lakshmi’s marriage has been fixed and that the boy is from Tirur.  The boy’s name Unnikrishnan.  A lot of excitement, the first of  our generation to get married was Lakshmi.  Lalithacheriamma, my aunt, and Venumamman, my uncle were tenured residents of Ernakulam and there were family and friends and more friends who knew them.  I went with my father to Tribhovandas Zaveri to buy Lakshmi her wedding gift and we decided on a “kada”.  I do not remember how we gave the same to her as we did not attend the wedding.  Happiness was when she called us on the day of her wedding and told my father that she is wearing the “nada” we gave her.

Now about Unniettan, he was then working at FACT and I had not met him till about 2 years after their wedding when Unniettan was posted to Dehri On Sone in Bihar and he and Lakshmi went there via Delhi and stayed with us.  That time Lakshmi stayed on with us till he went there and found a home and could take Lakshmi there.  There are stories he told of dacoits entering the train, the courage of his sister, Kalli, how he got hurt in that dacoity. Unniettan loves a good malayalee meal, be it breakfast, lunch or dinner.  He would devour the dosas and the idlis for breakfast and would tell my mother, Sunandamayee as he calls her, that it was very delicious.  If he has a good combination of dishes for lunch then he will say that it was as good as a sadya.

When my husband, Raja and I went to Kerala for the first time after our marriage, Unniettan took charge and showed us a bit of Cochin.  We went on a sunset trip on a jetty and thats when we saw the Mattancheri side of Cochin and the Bogatty island.  He regaled us with stories about the town, about FACT and educated Raja, who is an Odia, about Kerala, its history and politics.

What Unniettan and I have in common is also the fact that we both have our roots in the holy town of Guruvayur.  His ancestral home is opposite to Little Flower college that my mother did her graduation from and the families are known to each other.  I think that makes me a little bit of a favourite with him!!

When I was young, I will admit, I was in a bit of an awe of Unniettan and looked up at him with a bit of deference.   There were times when he would chastise me for reading while eating because he felt that when eating we need to enjoy food and concentrate on the flavours.  Then I used to get irritated but now I completely understand what was trying to tell me. It took some years for me to get comfortable and start talking to him freely.

I still remember the loss I felt in his voice when I called him after Venumamman died and I could feel  his sadness in that call from Chicago.  As it is Venumamman’s death was a shock to me but to sense that sadness in Uniettan’s voice made it more resonant.

The most recent times that i spent with Unniettan is for his son Vichu’s wedding last year and what a wedding it was, not only was the couple special, Unniettan made it special but giving us all an opportunity to get together and catering to all our whims and fancies.  As is very typical of him everything had his special touch, the food was catered but served by him and his nephews for us and us for them.  There was mehendi which i am sure he called for to indulge us, the women and girls of the family.  There was a night of dance and music when all of us danced like we were children.  The teasing, the dancing, the singing all was very intoxicating.  I saw a very relaxed side of Unniettan those days.

Unnietta, on this special birthday, I am writing this piece for you.  These are my treasured memories with you and about you and I cherish them.  Wish you a very happy birthday, many more years of togetherness with Lakshmi and a lifetime of health and happiness.